Marvel Movies Ranked, group 1: The Good
I haven’t seen Black Widow yet, so no idea where that fits in. That leaves 23 films, but putting them in a precise order sounded too much like work. So I divvied them up into three groups, but they’re in no particular order beyond that.
Thor 3: Ragnarok
This is a no-brainer. Good music, good jokes, good action, and Jeff Goldblum. Plus I like how Hulk calls Valkyrie “angry girl” and she likes it. This was after I made my exit from theaters, so I didn’t get around to watching it until it was on disc. I honestly wasn’t expecting much, but from the opening sequence I was sold. And Jeff Goldblum!
Iron Man 1
For a few months in 2008, this was the mountaintop. This was Glendale’s opening movie, so all the hiring and training and setup we’d been doing was all leading up to this. My screening print finally went up at 4 in the morning, and by the time all was said and done I’d set a personal record, with a 21-hour shift. Yikes. There’s a professionally-mounted and framed copy of this poster on the wall in the office at Glendale, or at least if someone didn’t swipe it when the shutdown rolled along. I kinda hope it’s gone, I’m loathe to leave behind any gifts to the AMC clowns that will be moving in.
Ant-Man 1
The film office (Pacific Theatres’ leadership was pretty dumb some days) thought Guardians 1 would be the first Marvel film to back off their “huge opening” pace, but I knew it would be Ant-Man. The MCU was still getting bigger and badder with Guardians, but Ant-Man would be low-profile whiplash into a small world, after all. And I was right. But it’s still a fun movie. I finally figured out why I don’t like their de-aging though, it’s the voices. Downey’s young/old voices are close, so the sim in Iron Man 2 just falls deeper into uncanny territory. But Michael Douglas’s old voice coming out of a younger face is just weird. It doesn’t fit.
Captain America 1: The First Avenger
When I watch a movie my brain tends to filter out the side stuff and focus on the central elements of the story. (That doesn’t work so well with Marvel films, where every frame has to include at least three references to something Marvel from some point in history.) Considering Bucky’s short screen time and, well, death, by the end of the movie I’d written off the guy as a character-building footnote for the hero. So I literally spent all of my first run though Winter Soldier wondering who the hell this Bucky person was, and had to give the first film a second watch. And you know what? It was pretty good. I was at Culver for this one, before it was gentrified into an ArcLight.
Black Panther
I was halfway expecting disaster with this one. A pandering, paternalist, exploitational, white-man’s-burden-fairytale. How the hell does a whitebread movie biz make a credible film about African characters in an African culture without making ‘A Raisin in the Vibranium’? And with a character with a dumb name like ‘Killmonger’ how can it avoid parody? But it generally worked, along with most of the soundtrack.
Captain America 2: The Winter Soldier
So does Cap ever get it on with Sharon Carter, or does he really go back to Aunt Agent in Endgame as the 40-yr-old supervirgin? I think the only real letdown in this one is the tower confrontation. When Johansson loses the disguise and cuts off Redford, she should have said, “I’m sorry, did I break your concentration?” and then cut to a quick reaction shot from Fury. That they didn’t was just weak writing.
Guardians of the Galaxy 1
Marvel movies were opening to bigger and bigger numbers, 100M+ openings were becoming commonplace. But sci-fi generally doesn’t play well, so the Film fools at Pacific/ArcLight pegged Guardians to open somewhere in the 60M range. I knew they were wrong, that Ant-Man would be the first dip and that was still two movies away. I wasn’t in programming at that point so I couldn’t do anything about the bad forecast, but luckily I was in staff scheduling so I could ignore the forecast and schedule for the crowd I knew we’d get. It meant some real trouble if I was wrong, considering the difference between the projection and the hours I was putting on the schedule, but I wasn’t wrong. It was fun reading the emails that weekend from buildings that were getting hit while we motored on through.
Spider-Man 1: Homecoming
When does Aunt May get her movie?
The Avengers 1
As characters go, the group is at their weakest in this one. With the exception of Downey, they’re still kinda feeling out their roles and the portrayals lack some of depth that’s within easier reach later on. But this is the group in its purest form. Tony without the angst, Steve without the cynicism, Hulk without glasses. And it was something DC hadn’t pulled off in all its own decades of filmmaking. You’re a leaf on the wind, Agent Coulson.
Thor 2: The Dark World
That’s right, I said it. Thor 2 gets shit elsewhere as one of Marvel’s weakest, but y’all are just wrong. It’s a gem. As befits a god of legend, the Thor films are like art periods. The first is definitely some kind of classical, the third almost Warhol-esque abstract at times. But Dark World is modern art, concepts on a screen, bold strokes and rough edges. I like how some of the finished shots look like concept art. I like the army of evil DJs. Thor himself looks like less of an albino, his sidekicks get some legit screen time (before they get killed off in 3), and Loki takes steps that become very interesting in the context of the Disney+ show (still in progress atm), considering that happens between Avengers & Dark World. And it’s got Darcy, how can you not like Darcy?
About The Author
davetwsprocket
Dave didn't get the memo until, like, just now. He is capable with arranging words, but only just getting started at getting those words to actually do anything. He is motivated by a disrespect for authority, and towards finally doing what's right. He's good with people, but that's a learned skill- his natural inclination is to be far, far away. He's a Leo.